here is my last november entry, november 30. i got home from a thanksgiving roadtrip on sunday - it was a very mixed bag, but i think in the way that it is meant to. it reminds me of christmas dinners with family at home, with the cozy vibe and family drama. right as we were heading out the door, we realized the grandpas dog had gone missing - we spent hours looking for it, and ended up starting the road trip home an hour later than planned. turns out, the dog was in his car the whole time. incredible.
i think meeting new people is always an experience to treasure, regardless of the quality of the time you spend with them. getting to take a peek into someone elses life is a gift, i think. i can imagine just what type of father the granddad was, and i think i would prefer my own father over him, but regardless, what stories he can tell and what a life he has had.
i get very spoiled by the family - to this day (5 days later!) i am still enjoying a box of luxury chocolates i purchased on the roadtrip. i am eating them slowly because oh man they are like the tears of angels in my mouth, and they do not ship to my home country in the online store, so this is a once in a lifetime experience. below i will share a few pictures from the month, but before then, one last topic to discuss. i still really like this one guy from home, and it's annoying how much i think about it, but it is at least not plagued by as much anxiety as these situations so often are for me. it is just the combination of the freezing weather, my period, and this crush, i think, that has me pondering on stupid things such as self worth and the meaning of life and stuff. hopefully i can come to some wise conclusion and share it with all my fans (possibly one, shoutout to silv)
picture time!

and to finish off this entry, a paragraph of "la reina" by Pablo Neruda

Yo te he nombrado reina.
Hay mas altas que tu, mas altas.
Hay mas puras que tu, mas puras.
Hay mas bellas que tu, mas bellas.

Pero tu eres la reina.

november 20ieth - the thanksgiving plans are made and i'm very excited for my first ever thanksgiving. i think it will be an exciting experience. i worry the most about the car ride part of the road trip.... i will be relying on my noise cancelling earbuds for that bit. the winter depression here really doesn't hit quite as hard as it does at home - but combined with homesickness it's certainly not pleasant either. during the day everything is fine and dandy, but at night when my friends and family are all asleep, i can feel so alone. that combined with this really unfortunate crush i have on my friend. something about unrequited crushes can really always get you down. this doesnt happen to me very often, i get crushes so rarely, and they're always invonvenient. it's stupid, being in love should feel fun and exciting, but it just makes me loose sleep and overthink. i hope it passes soon.

my november diary is starting quite late. it is november 16th as of writing this - but it seems silly to hold off on starting my diary untill december just so i can write from the beginning of the month. perhaps this entry can act as my introduction!   my name is (redacted) and i am an au pair in the US. my days are spent on working (as a nanny), hanging out with friends, creative pursuits and making plans for what i will be doing when i go back home. at the moment i am considering studying english at uni. yesterday i spent my day off going out to eat with a friend, passing my drivers knowledge exam and working on this website.  i am not yet sure what this website will become for me; but i cannot wait to find out.